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By Elaine Chatwin

Painting: Tappen Suite-Wild Roses (pastel on paper)  

Awareness is such an integral part of the equation that leads to successful reconciliation. One “ah ha” moment that was a turning point for me in this regard was reading the poem The Guest House by Rumi.

Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Until I read this poem, I had never considered welcoming the shadow or uncomfortable emotions that were part of that person called Elaine. I would struggle to banish these emotions and become a better person, (a more perfect person!). 

Now I understand that I am a pretty complicated “guest house”. And I welcome these old friends such as the need to be right, selfishness or pride as visitors who are here to offer a lesson. In the space of that gentle welcoming, I am much more likely to consider what I may choose to change and why I would like to change. My heart opens to the possibility of change… and with that opening, I often find myself on the path of reconciliation.